The Good, Bad, and Ugly

Holy holiday craziness! I love this time of year but it sure gets busy. I’ve been slacking on my blogging duties a little (nothing new) but I do have a few announcements for you.

The Good

I love The Onion. You know The Onion, right? The satirical news…um…paper. Can we call things “newspapers” anymore? They hardly exist. Newspapers are kind of relics, like speak-and-spells or centrist republicans.

Anyway, I’ve always loved The Onion and recently I had several ideas for fake news stories that I thought would be perfect for them. One problem though, they don’t take submissions! They have staff writers that come up with all of their content. That’s both impressive (the same people come up with such original humor day after day) and depressing (because I’m not one of them). 

Rather than setting my ideas aside I looked around and found a few Onion-like satirical online news sources that do accept submissions. Over the last week I’ve had 3 stories published on Glossy News.

CHECK THEM OUT!

P.S. - If you’ve never written satire you should give it a try. It’s a ton of fun. I try to keep my stories funny but inoffensive.  That having been said, as you can tell from the comments on the Palin story, if you touch on politics or religion, chances are pretty good that you’re going to offend someone. I just try not to be mean about it (note: the caption and picture on the Palin story are a little mean but those were contributed by the editor, not me).

The Bad

Rejection letters aren’t good. No matter how much we butter them up as learning experiences or chances to grow, rejection letters suck. That’s why this bit of news is under the “Bad” category. However, some rejection letters are better than others and some are freaking amazing. I recently had a short story rejected by the online science fiction magazine Bewildering Stories. The wonderful folks at BS (nice abbreviation) not only take the time and effort to have a team of reviewers look at every story that comes in, they go above and beyond to actually tell you what they think! Instead of a form “this story isn’t right for us” you get a whole personalized email telling you exactly why your story was rejected and what they think might improve it. Submit your stuff to them. They’re awesome.

The Ugly

While getting a rejection letter is bad, getting no response is worse. I realize that some agents and publishers don't respond to most queries/submittals but they usually warn authors on their website. I'm not talking about them. I'm talking about a market that promises a response but don't come through. For example, I submitted a science fiction short story (probably the best thing I've ever written) to the fledgling online magazine Specutopia in mid October. 

Like I do with every submission, I played the waiting game. I tried not to think too much about how many days it had been in review. I got excited when the story wasn't rejected in the average response time. I got worried when the response time went past the average, then double, but I waited to contact the editor until the minimum 60 days specified on the website. In the meantime their website stopped working altogether. At 60 days I queried and after a week without a response I withdrew the story.

I'm sure Sepcutopia wasn't planning on going out of business or falling into a black hole or whatever happened to them. I'm not mad at them for that. What butters my bread is the lack of communication. A one sentence email or a brief announcement on their website would have saved me weeks of stress and allowed me to sent that story, my favorite story, somewhere else. So screw you Specutopia. I'm glad you're dead.

The Good - Part 2

I almost forgot. I’m scheduled to have my science fiction short story “Lightning Flashed” (which is the same story that was rejected by Bewildering Stories) in the 4th issue of Dark Edifice in early February! Those of you that have been following my antics for a while may have already read this story when it was published on OnFictionWriting. It may not be a new story but it’s still cool to get it out there for new readers. I’ll let everyone know when it’s out. 

Happy New Year!

Shout Out Friday

It's been a while since I've posted any shout-outs and I think today is a good day for it.

First off, the always interesting Veronica Sicoe posted a great piece asking how much science (and scientific plausibility) is necessary in science fiction?

Along the same thread, check out the 2012 Hugo winning Fan-zine SF Signal for tons of cool science fiction content.

Baby rhinos are so cute! Photo by Han van Hoof.

For those folks interested in actual science, here's a very cool story about tainting rhino horns in order to deter poachers. Very cool!

For those of you wanting to get a manuscript out to agents in a new and exciting way, be sure to check out Miss Snark's First Victim's "Bakers Dozen Challenge" where 60 stories will be selected to have their first 250 words posted for agents to "bid on".Nice!

Want a laugh? Check out OFW's "Ten Gifts You Should Never Give a Writer". Brief but hilarious!

Finally, I've had to update my "My Fiction" page because I've had another micro-fiction (I think that's the most appropriate term for it) piece published on 140fiction.com. Please check out my story "God's Plan".

Have a great weekend!

On The Other Side of the Desk

You're called into an office and you take a seat. Whoever is sitting at the desk, you've stepped into their realm, their home base. You're out of your element Donny. You look up at them, not only because the situation demands it but because they're sitting in a throne-like office chair while you're crouched in an oddly tiny reception chair. The seating arrangement isn't the only uncomfortable part of this situation. You're vulnerable. You're in a position to be judged. Your ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE DESK.

President Obama at the Resolute Desk in the oval office.

BUM, BUM, BUUUUMMMMMM!!!!


Being on the other side of a desk from someone in a position of authority is not only intimidating and uncomfortable, sometimes to the point of terrifying, but infinitely relateable. We've all been there. Whether it was a visit to principles office back in grade-school, a job interview, bad news from a doctor, or an ass-chewing from a boss, everyone has been on the business end of of a desk-visit. This is a universally understandable experience.

And this makes it a perfect addition to your story.

As writers, our goal is to put our readers into the story. To do this we have to give them situations, emotions, characters, settings, etc., that they can relate to and identify with. Putting your character on the other side of the desk gives your readers instant-empathy for that character. 

I've actually written several short stories recently that take place exclusively at the desk. One is a robot sci-fi story I've submitted to Asimov's Science Fiction (keep your fingers crossed for me) and the other is a "genetic enhancement" sci-fi story that's up for critique at On Fiction Writing. I would love to hear what folks have to say about the latter. If you're up for doing some critiquing (it's only ~1,200 words) head over to OFW and click the "Critique" tab on the top of the page. My story is called "Customer Service".

Or if you're not feeling OFW, shoot me an email at adamg73 [at] juno [dot] com and I'll email you the story. Thanks!!!

Happy 4th and a Short Story!

Happy Independence Day everyone! I hope everyone has a fun, sunny, and safe fourth, whether here in the good ol' U.S. of A or somewhere else in the world.

I have something else to celebrate as well: I have a short story up at On Fiction Writing! Please check it out and let me know what you think!

On Fiction Writing

I know I've mentioned this site a few times (probably because I'm so impressed with it) but I want to encourage everyone once again to go check out On Fiction Writing, a wonderful on-line writing community that has improving my quality of life ten fold!

OFW has weekly author interviews, regular features with tips and techniques to improve your writing, book reviews, flash fiction, and my personal favorite, the opportunity for critique from fellow writers. Check out the in the Agora section to post query letters and synopses for critique or head over to the Workshops page to post chapters and short stories and to review what others have submitted. Nothing helps your own writing quite like critiquing others, believe me. 

AND, for a limited time (not really) I have a robot-centric sci-fi short story up for review that I would love for anyone and everyone to tear apart.

So go to OFW, get involved in the writing community, and critique my story!