1. Go to page 77 of your current MS.
2. Go to line 7.
3. Copy down the next 7 lines, sentences, or paragraphs - and post them as they're written. No cheating.
4. Tag 7 authors.
5. Let them know.
Here are my 7 from my fantasy manuscript "Sol of a Gladiator". Please let me know what you think!
The young woman standing before him certainly appeared to be in better shape than his last spoil. Sol, on the other hand, was a good deal sorer this time around, a fact that worried him. He was barely through the Emperor’s birthday week and he had the whole of the Winter Festival to look forward to. Things seemed to get a little harder every season. He tried to remind himself that he wasn’t that old but at the same time he couldn't forget how quickly the stadium could age a person.
The woman was small; short with a petite frame. She was slim but not the skeletal-skinny the ladies in the luxury boxes worked for and the slaves in the tunnels couldn’t avoid. She had generous hips and relatively long legs for her short stature. Long curly chestnut colored hair hung down over her face as she stood with her arms crossed, head down. Even in the dim light Sol could see the bruises on her thighs and arms. He could also see the goose bumps.
He stood up, slowly so as not to startle her. Taking the blanket from his bed he handed it to her.
“Here, it’s cold down here. You’re not exactly bundled up.”
She took the blanket without lifting her head and quickly wrapped it around her, covering the sheer outfit she had been provided.
Sitting on the edge of the bed Sol spoke gently, “I’m not going to hurt you.” He wasn’t sure she could even understand him. “I won’t even touch you without permission. My name is Sol. What’s yours?”
“You won’t touch me?” She was trembling, “You’ll keep away?” It was obvious she didn’t believe him.
Intriguing!
ReplyDeleteJust one small nit-pick: you use the word small alongside petite and that's redundant. Petite implies small.
Good luck with your querying.
Nice catch. Thanks for the small nit-pick (say, isn't that a little redundant?). Ha!
ReplyDeleteInteresting snip. It certainly gives insight into your character's personality.
ReplyDeleteI really liked the first two paragraphs -- immediately wanted to know more about this world. I'm imagining roman gladiator combat, but where it's not just slaves.
ReplyDeleteI also liked the detail about the noble women trying to be skeletal, and the slaves not being able to avoid it. Nice section! Some punctuation issues, but other than that, it seemed pretty clean. :)
Gladiator combat it is! Like the Roman Coliseum but with crazy fantasy beasts. Thanks for the input!
ReplyDelete