My Publisher Tells You What She's Looking For In A Query Letter

I have a treat for you! One half of the dynamic duo that is Mirror World Publishing, home to my soon to be released debut novel Sol of the Coliseum, fellow author and publisher Justine Alley Dowsett has stopped by to share what she, as a publisher, is looking for in a query letter. That's right! Query letter help directly from a publisher! How great is that!

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A good or even great query letter is not going to guarantee publication with a small press or even a larger one, but it goes a long way toward your book being noticed and remembered and that can sometimes make all the difference. The best query letter I’ve ever received came from Elliot Baker for his novel, The Sun God’sHeir. Elliot has given me permission to share his query letter with you, so I want to discuss what makes it so great, so you can have an idea what an editor or publisher, like me, is looking for.

  

Here goes:

Dear Ms. Dowsett and Ms. Damodred,

(Even in the opening line, the author is showing that he has done his research and knows whom he is addressing +10 points.)

It was a pleasant surprise to read your request coming on the heels of my former publisher's unfortunate demise. Thank you for reaching out.

(Here the author mentions how he/she came across this opportunity. Something like this or really anything that creates a possible link the author has to the publisher will help to form an immediate connection in the publisher's mind and therefore make that author, or his book, stand out. +10 points.)

I am seeking a new home for The Sun God’s Heir.

(Direct and to the point. +10 points)

an epic metaphysical adventure with historical underpinnings

(He tells us what it is, the genre and possible target audience. Lets us know immediately if it is something we would be interested in.  And, it is. +10 points.)

complete at 105,000 words.

(This information is actually important. Crucial, even. It tells us how big of a project this is. Whether it's a short story, a novella or a full-length novel. In our case, we only publish full-length novels of 50,000+words, but might balk if it was 200,000+words as we don't have the time and man-power to dedicate to a project that size. No points awarded for this, it should just be included, every time.)

A possible well-worn comp would be Diana Gabaldon's Outlander series.

(Negative 1 point for shortening the word 'comparison'. This is a novel he is pitching and he is a writer, so we expect to see full words used. However, I like the comparison. You can't go wrong with comparing yourself to a well-loved and undisputedly well-written novel series. Not necessary, but it helps us to understand again the style and genre of your book as well as a possible target audience for it. )

I have completed the second book in the series along with ninety-thousand words of the third.

(Ok. It's a series, not a stand-alone. +10 points that he is pitching the first in the series and not all three. Obviously if we like the first enough to pick it up, we will probably end up publishing the series, but this way we only have to look at one book at a time. That being said, it's nice to know in advance that there will be more to come. It's good to be upfront about things like that. It lets the publisher make an informed decision and know what they are getting into should they choose to go forward.)

In 17th-century France, a young pacifist kills to protect the woman he loves, unwittingly opening a door for the reincarnation of an ancient Egyptian general determined to continue a reign of terror begun three thousand years ago.

(A concise synopsis that captures the imagination and also manages to show a hint of the author's style at the same time. Excellent +20 points.)

Taking up the sword will not be enough. Rene must reclaim his own ancient past to stop the red tide of slavery from engulfing the world.

Joined by a powerful sheikh, his sword wielding daughter, and a family of Maranos escaping the Spanish Inquisition, they fight their way through pirates, typhoons, and dark assassins to reach Morocco, the home of an occult sect that has waited for Rene through the eons.

(A little more information now that we're drawn in can't hurt. He tells us what's at stake, what we can expect, and again hints at genre and target audience.)

Published in July of 2014, I was pleased with the review response the work received on Amazon and elsewhere. http://tinyurl.com/12345

(Both mentions the author's history as well as how the book has been received so far by people who have read it, but doesn't dwell on the details. He also helpfully provides a link should we wish to research it further ourselves. +10 points)

I understand that everything is up for change in a re-publication, but I have acquired the images on the current cover anyway.

(Shows the author is both flexible and helpful and understands the publishing business. +10 points. Since authors and publishers are essentially entering into a business partnership, these qualities are important and it's nice to see them as early as the query letter.)

Attached please find the first three chapters and a brief synopsis. Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you.

(This shows the author read the submission guidelines and has followed them. He is also again polite and subtly requesting a response from us. +10 points)

Cheers,

Elliot Baker

So that's... a lot of points, but the count isn't what's important and neither is following a template. What you need to do is be yourself, use your own writing style and hit all the highlights.  You're a writer. Let your writer’s 'voice' speak for you. If a publisher likes your style of writing and its present right from the query letter, that publisher or editor will be that much more inclined to like the rest of your work also. A query letter is basically just a first impression, so make it count! 

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A big thanks to Elliot Baker for letting Allie critique his query letter here and a huge thanks to Justine for such an insightful post!

Be sure to check out the Coming Soon page over a Mirror World Press for a list of all their exciting new releases, including my own Sol of the Coliseum coming out next month!

Writing Songs

Dear Sir or Madam,

Will you read my book? It took me years to write, will you take a look? It's based on a novel by a man named Lear and I need a job, so I want to be a paperback writer.

It's a dirty story of a dirty man, and his clinging wife doesn't understand. Their son is working for the Daily Mail, it's a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer,

It's a thousand pages, give or take a few. I'll be writing more in a week or two. I can make it longer if you like the style. I can change it round and I want to be a paperback writer.

If you really like it you can have the rights. It could make a million for you overnight. If you must return it, you can send it here. But I need a break and I want to be a paperback writer.

Sincerely,
Paperback Writer

I'm a Beatles fan and I've probably listened to the song "Paperback Writer" (these are slightly modified lyrics) a couple hundred times but it wasn't until I wrote my first query letter that I actually understood what John Lennon and Paul McCartney were getting at.

It's a freaking query letter!

Like most writers, I'm fascinated by words. So I guess it's not surprising that I love song lyrics. I've even written a couple songs myself!

And I LOVE it when two of my favorite things come together, writing and music.

There are dozens of songs that reference different aspects of writing. Lyric writing is a craft unto itself but it shares a lot with all writing genres. For example:

Anna Nalick shares the pain of the creative process and what it feels like to have something so personal go out into the world for everyone to put their own spin on.

Willie Nelson and Waylon Jennings share their thoughts about work ethic and dealing with publishers music executives.

And Vampire Weekend even has strong opinions about grammar!

 

I'll leave you today with a quote from songwriter and singer Tracy Chapman that mirrors my own feelings about all types of writing:
 
Songwriting is a very mysterious process. It feels like creating something from nothing. It's something I don't feel like I really control.

Revised Query Letter: Please Help

The time has come for me to enter into the query process. A couple of you (awesome people) were good enough to give some me some pointers on a previous version of my query. I am posting a revised version and I'll be eternally grateful (aka I'll be more than willing to return the favor...or paint your house or something) to anyone and everyone that is generous enough to share their thoughts. Here it is:

Dear Agent-X,

In the heart of the tyrannical Astrolian Empire, deep in the bowels of the Coliseum, the orphan Sol is raised by a makeshift family of sympathetic guards and fellow slaves to become the most famed gladiator in all the land.  With his fighting partner, a yeti-like giant from the frozen south, Sol must battle cunning warriors and exotic beasts to delight the crowd and stay alive. 

When a captured member of the Resistance is forced into Sol’s cell as a sex-prize, her words of rebellion compel Sol to question his long-accepted fate as a slave.  Outside the Coliseum, an unknown bard’s tales transform Sol into a symbol of defiance and inspire an oppressed populace hungry for a hero. The streets fill with talk of revolution and the Empire decides the fighter must fall.

To quell this potential insurgence Astrolia’s most ruthless assassin is tasked with Sol’s vilification and eventual demise. Sol’s only hope is to rely on friends, new and old, in order to do what no slave has ever done: escape the Coliseum and the only home he’s ever known.

Thank you for the opportunity to submit to Agency-X. SOL OF A GLADIATOR is an adult Fantasy novel complete at 84,000 words. I am seeking your representation because...

Thank you for your time and consideration. 

Sincerely,

Adam Gaylord

Phone No.

email address

http://adamsapple2day.blogspot.com/

Catching Up

The ladies say "Hi".

I just got back from a week out at one of my field sites in eastern Oregon and in addition to having no internet access (which was a nice break) I got to see some of my ladies (elk). The fur is flying out there (literally- they're shedding their winter coats) and the whole place is a mud hole but I had a good time, saw some cool wildlife (great grey owl, ermine, bald eagle, etc), and had a wonderfully quite setting to FINISH MY WIP!  That's right, after countless rounds of revision I am calling my current epic fantasy WIP ready for query. I'll probably be posting my query letter and asking for feedback soon so stay tuned.


Also, I know we're not supposed to talk about our rejections on our blogs (I promise, I won't do it again) but I received my first ever official rejection letter a couple days ago. I'm sure I won't feel so enthusiastic about all of my rejections but for this one, my very first, I had to celebrate the milestone. Now I'm a writer for sure!

In other news, I wanted to thank the always wonderful Veronica Sicoe for mentioning me on her blog and I encourage everyone to check out the site On Ficton Writing where Veronica is an editor. It's a great resource for writers.

Finally I would like to thank everyone for stopping by my humble writing blog. It's been a little over a month since I dusted the cobwebs off this thing and changed it from a me-bitching-about-politics blog to a writing blog. Since that time I've had roughly 1,000 page views, over three-dozen comments, and I'm up to seven followers (hooray followers!!!)! Thank you to everyone who's visited and commented. I'll do my best to keep saying interesting...stuff.

Pippin is excited!

Shout Out Friday

To end the work week I'd like to give a couple shouts to two fellow writers/bloggers who have been awesome enough to help me out with my query letter. Check out their blogs and give them some love!

Feaky Snucker is the alias of a Canadian writer, blogger, singer who has great edgy writing blog where she unashamedly uses big words and bad words. She's awesome.

David Powers King is a fantasy author with a popular writing blog that just passed the 600 follower mark. Congratulations David!

I also want to want to make folks aware of a couple writing contest that are great for getting your creative juices flowing:

Writers Digest has a very cool Your Story Competition where you work from a prompt (a picture, a sentence, a list of words) to create part of or all of a story. These prompts come out on an irregular basis but there's one out right now that has a deadline of April 10th so get yours in. Plus it's free!

My other favorite ongoing contest is the Writers Weekly 24-hour Short Story Competition. These are held on a quarterly basis and, as the name suggests, writers are given just 24-hours to come up with a short story based on a prompt. The Spring 2012 contest is coming up April 28th and registration is limited to the first 500 people. It's only $5 and it's a ton of fun.

Have a good weekend!

Please Critique My Query Letter!

I'm gonna do something crazy. I'm going post the query letter I've been working on for my fantasy manuscript. I know this blog doesn't get a lot of traffic (yet) but hopefully a few of you will take the time to give me a little constructive criticism. Once I'm done with my final manuscript revisions (soon hopefully) I'll submit the query to the all powerful Query Shark and maybe Workshop Wednesdays at BookEnds, LLC. but for now I'm going to throw it onto my own humble little blog. 

Ok, here it goes:

Dear Properly Spelled Agent's Name

In the heart of the tyrannical Astrolian Empire, deep in the bowels of the Coliseum, the orphan Sol is raised by a makeshift family of guards and fellow slaves to become the most famed gladiator in all the land.  With his fighting partner, a yeti-like giant from the frozen south, Sol must battle cunning warriors and fantastic beasts to delight the crowd and stay alive. 

When a captured member of the Resistance is forced into Sol’s cell as a sex-prize, her words of defiance compel Sol to question his long-accepted fate as a slave.  Outside the stadium, an unknown bard’s tales transform Sol into a revolutionary folk hero and inspire an oppressed populace.  The Empire decides that the fighter must fall and Astrolia’s most ruthless assassin is tasked with Sol’s vilification and eventual demise. Sol’s only hope is to rely on friends, new and old, in order to do what no slave has ever done: escape from the coliseum and the only home he’s ever known.

SOL OF A GLADIATOR is a fantasy novel complete at 83,000 words. I am seeking your representation because I love your blog. Thank you for your time and consideration. 

Sincerely,

Adam Gaylord

Contact info 

So, what do you think? Is it ready? Is it a flop? What needs work? Where am I? AHHHHHH!!!!

Thank you very much for your help.

Should Writers Post Manuscript Pages on their Blogs?

Google has failed me.

Usually I just type in a question and the all-powerful Google tells me the answers. Since I've been trying to figure out whether I should post the first few pages of my manuscript on this blog, I asked the Google but to no avail. I'm sure that somewhere in the infinite blogoverse there is the perfect post telling me what to do but for now all I've been able to find are clues. For example, the awesomely cool Query Shark commented way back in 2008 that:

"If an agent doesn't ask for pages, or specifically says not to send them, I do like the idea of a blog or a website with pages available. That's a good idea. I've actually started looking at some of those."

I'm pretty much in the do-whatever-the-Query-Shark-says camp but I wish there was something out there a little more definitive. Have you seen anything? Should I grow a pair and post some pages? Throw me a bone!